omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
