She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
soo... how was my night?
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize