I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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