So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
