U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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