Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
