I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night�
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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