Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
