it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
