Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
