You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
