Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
