I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
50% drunk capacity currently
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Randomize
