And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize