i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
