oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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