Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
