she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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