have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
