In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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