I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
You were trust falling into bushes
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
