walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
