i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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