therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
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