my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize