Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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