So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
My breasts were aching with rage.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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