I smell stomach acid.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize