this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
