Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
