me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
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