woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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