I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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