Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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