She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
