Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
we're making bets on your personal life
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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