the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Just cropdusted the office
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
