these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
