I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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