Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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