Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
