this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Randomize
