: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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