Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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