hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
