She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
