we're blogging at a bar
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
