She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
