For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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