my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
